August 15, 2012

adoption & the gospel pt 3

IMG_3636
(the bed our sweet amos slept in for most of his life)

there are days & season when i feel my "orphan" state trying to come out again.
it's like my spirit tries to revert to that. i've seen it in amos... he feels like he has to manipulate mommy & daddy for love, he has to cry louder than his brothers to get attention, or he falls apart when food is put away. he learned to be "alone" & at times it's hard for him to just rest in our love for him & feel safe. over my 28 years of life i've seen this tendency in me... & it's hard to see at times, because i've been "adopted" for so many of those 28 years... i don't remember not being His daughter. the enemy lies to me to get me to believe that i'm alone, i don't have anyone or anything, i've got to look out for myself.

Father, remind me of what You've saved me from. by Your grace guard me from returning to my "orphan" state. may i be so secure in Your love that i will never be abandoned again. 
You are good!!!
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read pt 1 & pt 2.
al

3 comments:

Pro said...

Very well said, Al!! Beautiful!

constanze linnea said...

Dear Al,

yesterday i found your blog, don`t know how, just found it...i am so deeply touched and inspired, it feels i already know you and i guess it`s because you are so open and vulnerable but also so strong and powerful.

i wish you and your fam the best, never ending, growing love, blessings and everything your heart is asking for.

dearest,
constanze (from germany).

allison barker said...

thank u so much constanze! thank u for following along!

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